Here comes the Bride

I'm 11 days away from watching my bride walk down one of the most expensive pieces of fabric I will ever rent. It sounds crazy but I bought an extra toothbrush to keep by my bathroom sink so I could be reminded when I brush my teeth that all the little things I'm used to are about to change. In our first 6 months to a year my knowledge of Molly is going to increase so much more than I can imagine. I'm going to find out things like if she puts her bath towel in the hamper after one use or hangs it up in the bathroom for multiple uses like me. Over the years I will learn all of her idiosyncrasies and she will learn all of mine. I have no idea what's going to happen but I'm so excited because I'm not afraid. The changes I'm going to go through are going to be worth it because she means that much to me and she means even more to Jesus. So no matter how difficult some of our struggles may be we have hope and we believe in God's plan for our lives.

Unfortunately, Molly (my fiance) and I, like most people, have had a rough journey through life. We both come from homes built on a foundation of fear. We both stumbled through life by making multiple bad decisions, following our misguided emotions and for us hope was that dream you have a hard time remembering when you wake up. Eventually we hit the ground so hard there was nowhere else to look but up. We started following Jesus in our later teen years. I was 17 in 2003 and she was 19 in 2007. Before we were Christians we never thought we would be getting married. Jesus changed our perspective on love and through the Holy Spirit we understood the true meaning of our existence. To be loved and to love others. My life experiences and my relationship with Jesus have taught me that marriage is about loving your wife like Christ loves the church.

Our scars remind us of the journey that brought us both to this point. Our goal is that our marriage will continue to represent how Jesus takes something broken and makes it into something beautiful. The thing that makes us feel most loved is God's endless and unconditional pursuit for our hearts. Not having money, loosing jobs, physical illness, and even death is no longer something to be afraid of. We know that our home is not going to be built on the conditions our world puts on us. It will be built on the unfailing love of Jesus Christ.


1 John 4:16-19

"We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.

   God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.

Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. We love each other because he loved us first."

Where I will be in January

If you would like to know what church I'm transitioning to in January you can check out the website here.

This video is also a cool way to get to know Living Word. It spoke to my heart and I hope it will encourage you as well.

Cardboard Testimonies - November 2011 from Living Word Community Church on Vimeo.

This is what Living Word is all about. Just in case you didn't feel like checking out the website I copy and pasted the mission statement for you. Molly and I are really excited for our future there. :)

OUR MISSION: Living Word is a grace-filled community where the messiness of life, the message of hope,  and the beauty of Jesus converge.

Relationships can be amazing

My girlfriend and I have an amazing relationship. We both communicate with each other on a regular basis. We both share the same heartbeat for others. We both love kids and see our future being dedicated to investing in them. We share a similar past and we can relate to each other’s feelings. We have a strong connection and we are responsive to each other. We can look into each other’s eyes and be satisfied beyond our imagination. Our conversations are rich and we actually enjoy listening to each other speak. We are not perfect at all. I would even be comfortable saying that we have more problems than most people. The best part about all of this is that we have nothing to do with how this is working so well. This relationship has been organic in nature since day one. Our paths crossed and we just clicked.

I think that one reason our relationship is so good is because we know who we are. We have individual lives and we love the people God has shaped us into. We don’t expect very much from each other. Ten years ago this concept would have been crazy to me because relationships were all about being together. Girls would cling but never be satisfied and I would make demands but never got want I really wanted. After a couple of heartbreaks I realized that relationships are not about having attachments to people. Relationships are about being able to relate with someone that is not like you. Caring about the things you never cared about, learning the things you never thought you would learn, understanding the needs of someone you never expected to fulfill, relating and truly caring about someone no matter how different, these are the foundation to a good relationship. The best thing about us is that we can balance our lives individually and together. God has blessed us with an understanding that his grace is the source of our relationship and without it we would be drowning in a sea of unfulfilled expectations and demands.

I'm so thankful for Molly and how much she loves being God’s masterpiece. I love you babe ;)! 

God is always with you

The Psalms are great. I think that's why I love reading them so much. I read some of them and get comforted by the poetic descriptions of God's goodness and love. David's uncut journals about abandonment and shame encourage me to push through my own hurts and hang ups. The Psalms that talk about God's wrath being poured out on David's enemies paint a picture of God's Holiness. 


Psalm 139 is one of my favorites. David teaches us that we are never alone and that God will never abandon us. We also read about this in Deuteronomy 31:6&8. 


So the question I'm interested in answering is why? If this is true and God is always with us then why does it seem that there are specific moments in life in which it feels like God is far away?  


I'm going to make a suggestion. There are two myths out there that we tend to fall for every time.


Myth 1-We think God leaves us alone because others have.
Maybe you've felt abandoned by others. I remember when my dad died. I felt extremely alone and I asked God for help but I never felt like he was there. I tried to look to my family for help but my mom would say things that made me so mad (my parents got divorced). She wasn't going to step up to help. It felt like I was the only one left in my family to take care of my little sister. Dad was so close to both of us and we were hurting bad. The people that abandoned me in life were the people that were always supposed to be there for me. If they wouldn't help me why would God want to help me?


Myth 2-We think God leaves us alone because of our mistakes.
The truth is that every time I would do something I knew God wouldn't approve of it felt like he was off in some other galaxy. God always seemed distant from me during and immediately after my sin. I just figured God was far away from me because I was always sinning. At one point I felt like God would never want to be around the man I was. Because I felt that way I figured he was never there. Our feelings and/or decisions don't determine if God is with us or not.


The truth is that nothing will ever separate you from the love of God.


Rom 8:38 And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[a] neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.


Maybe the key to understanding if God is with you doesn't depend on him alone. God is there and he is ready to be with you. When was the last time that you looked for him? In our culture its so easy to be self-relient. God is always with you but you need to rely on him. He wont force the relationship on you. He also never leaves because he knows how much you need him. 


Are there any areas in life that you are treading alone? When do you feel most alone? Know that God is with you.

The mystery of God's love

I am in a local Starbucks and I'm posted up in this big comfy seat getting ready to study. I look across from me and I noticed this binder labeled Apologetics laying on the table next to this guy. So I discretely investigated a little further. Well I guess yelling out "hey! do you teach Apologetics?" would have been more discrete if everyone in the place didn't turn their head and look.  What can I say, I'm a classy guy. Despite my awkward introduction we were able to strike up some really great conversation. One of the things we talked about was teaching scripture. He teaches at a local Seminary in town. We both agreed that how we teach the scripture today is dangerously far from the way Jesus taught scripture.

Pastors generally tell great stories but we fail to contextualize the mysteries of Heaven. The mystery of the Gospel is found in the "why" not the "how". Why love bloodied itself for the redemption of an unworthy human race is a mystery. When the Gospel gets presented in its truest form the listener will thirst for it to have personal substance. 

The focus of our teachings can't be about how to prevent a screwed up life. We miss the point when we make behavior modification our focus. Jesus didn't teach the 3 steps to spiritual success because it comes with a condition. Intimacy in relationships comes from unconditional love. Love that looks you in the eye in the middle of your lowest moment and shows no reservation. I believe that Jesus always has and always will look at us with glossy eyes. He is divine and human, man and God. He knows all and he forgives all.

The way that we should teach is the way that Jesus taught. It's the most effective way to invite someone into the mystery that is eternity. The Parables were always about raising more questions than giving answers. I think we need to rip out a page from the Bible (is that legal?) and craft teachings that inspire the listener to pursue the mystery of love. The same love that is at the heart of the Holy Trinity. 

Colossians 1

 ¹⁵ Christ is the visible image of the invisible God.
      He existed before anything was created and is supreme over all creation,^[e]
 16 for through him God created everything
      in the heavenly realms and on earth.
   He made the things we can see
      and the things we can’t see—
   such as thrones, kingdoms, rulers, and authorities in the unseen world.
      Everything was created through him and for him.
 ¹⁷ He existed before anything else,
      and he holds all creation together.
 ¹⁸ Christ is also the head of the church,
      which is his body.
   He is the beginning,
      supreme over all who rise from the dead.^[f]
      So he is first in everything.
 ¹⁹ For God in all his fullness
      was pleased to live in Christ,
 ²⁰ and through him God reconciled
      everything to himself.
   He made peace with everything in heaven and on earth
      by means of Christ’s blood on the cross.